Deal With It

Have you ever wanted to spank Heidi Klum?  Or, at the very least, see her get a smack on the butt?

I'm pretty sure Heidi Klum has made my Top Ten list of celebrity females that I'd love to spank at least once, if not more.  Alas, it probably is never going to happen, and I really can't help you make it a reality, either.  But as far as seeing her get her a smack on the bottom--I can point you in the right direction for that.

There's a fairly new TV show called Deal With It.  It's a hidden camera/prank/game show.  The "contestants" are usually a couple in a public place which is controlled by the show--everyone in the building is in one the gag.One member of the couple is discreetly and privately pulled aside and asked to participate on the show for a chance to win $5,000.  If they agree, they're fitted with an earpiece, and all they have to do to win money is do whatever the voice in their ear tells them to do.  For each instruction or challenge that they successful pull off, they're awarded a certain amount of money.  They might be told to say or do certain things.  They might have to accomplish something within a time limit.  The show usually brings in a celebrity guest to be on the microphone behind the scenes giving the player his or her instructions.  The other member of the couple, of course, has no clue as to what is going on while their friend's behavior becomes increasingly odd or bizarre or rude and obnoxious.  That's not a great explanation of the show--you'd probably need to watch an episode to get a better understanding of it.  I'm sure they explain it better than I do.

There are normally two segments per half-hour show, and each segment features a different guest celebrity.  In the 5th episode of the season, the second guest star on the show was Heidi Klum (her segment starts at about the 20-minute mark of the show).  A man was picked out and asked to wear the earpiece, and he agreed.  He was there with a female friend.  They began with some simple challenges--Heidi asked him to start talking with a German accent, for example.  The man's female companion looked like a very no-nonsense type, and she grew increasingly bewildered at her friend's behavior as this went on.

Then, Heidi instructed him that, in a few minutes, she was going to enter and walk across the lobby, and the man should come over and smack her on the ass.  (Someone later commented, "He should be paying us!")

Behind the scenes, Heidi called over Howie Mandel, who is a producer on the show, and asked him to take her place on the microphone to continue giving the man instructions.  She explained that she was going to go into the lobby and the man was to slap her on the butt.  Howie joked, "And what's the challenge?"

(Oh, really, Howie?  Does Heidi often ask men to smack her on the bottom?  Please, do go on and tell us more....)

Heidi walks across the lobby, as planned.  The man tells his female friend, "That's Heidi Klum!  She's so hot.  I'm going to slap her on the ass."  He starts to get up, and his friend is practically hanging onto his arm trying to restrain him.  He gets away, though, walks up behind Heidi, and gives her a very nice smack on her backside.  I must say, the camera captures it perfectly.

So, does the man eventually win $5,000?  Sadly, no.  Heidi reacts to the bottom-smack by slapping his face (fingertips only, so it's not a hard slap).  He sits back down and is instructed to call Heidi over, but then is supposed to get his friend to tell Heidi, "I'm sorry" within a certain amount of time.  Since his friend has done nothing wrong, she naturally--and stubbornly--refuses, and the time limit runs out on him.  Once it's all over, of course, they let the female friend in on what has been going on.

All in all, it's a very nice one-whacker to a very nice derriere.  I haven't seen a clip of it online yet, but I suspect it's only a matter of time.

Until then, I think the only fair thing to do is to name Heidi Klum as Dr. Ken's Spankable Bottom Of The Week.  Here's a few photos to support that claim--







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